Chapter 34 - Of The Embarrassment Of Riches
D'Artagnan lost no time, and as soon as the thing wassuitable and opportune, he paid a visit to the lordtreasurer of his majesty. He had then the satisfaction toexchange a piece of paper, covered with very ugly writing,for a prodigious number of crowns, recently stamped with theeffigies of his very gracious majesty Charles II.
D'Artagnan easily controlled himself: and yet, on thisoccasion, he could not help evincing a joy which the readerwill perhaps comprehend, if he deigns to have someindulgence for a man who, since his birth, had never seen somany pieces and rolls of pieces juxtaplaced in an ordertruly agreeable to the eye. The treasurer placed all therolls in bags, and closed each bag with a stamp sealed withthe arms of England, a favor which treasurers do not grantto everybody. Then impassible, and just as polite as heought to be towards a man honored with the friendship of theking, he said to D'Artagnan:
"Take away your money, sir." Your money! These words made athousand chords vibrate in the heart of D'Artagnan, which hehad never felt before. He had the bags packed in a smallcart, and returned home meditating deeply. A man whopossesses three hundred thousand crowns can no longer expectto wear a smooth brow; a wrinkle for every hundred thousandlivres is not too much.
D'Artagnan shut himself up, ate no dinner, closed his doorto everybody, and, with a lighted lamp, and a loaded pistolon the table, he watched all night, ruminating upon themeans of preventing these lovely crowns, which from thecoffers of the king had passed into his coffers, frompassing from his coffers into the pockets of any thiefwhatever. The best means discovered by the Gascon was toinclose his treasure, for the present, under locks so solidthat no wrist could break them, and so complicated that nomaster-key could open them. D'Artagnan remembered that theEnglish are masters in mechanics and conservative industry;and he determined to go in the morning in search of amechanic who would sell him a strong box. He did not go far;Master Will Jobson, dwelling in Piccadilly, listened to hispropositions, comprehended his wishes, and promised to makehim a safety lock that should relieve him from all futurefear.
"I will give you," said he, "a piece of mechanism entirelynew. At the first serious attempt upon your lock, aninvisible plate will open of itself and vomit forth a prettycopper bullet of the weight of a mark - which will knockdown the intruder, and not without a loud report. What doyou think of it?"
"I think it very ingenious," cried D'Artagnan, "the littlecopper bullet pleases me mightily. So now, sir mechanic, theterms?"
"A fortnight for the execution, and fifteen hundred crownspayable on delivery," replied the artisan.
D'Artagnan's brow darkened. A fortnight was delay enough toallow the thieves of London time to remove all occasion forthe strong box. As to the fifteen hundred crowns - thatwould be paying too dear for what a little vigilance wouldprocure him for nothing.
"I will think of it," said he, "thank you, sir." And hereturned home at full speed; nobody had yet touched histreasure. That same day Athos paid a visit to his friend andfound him so thoughtful that he could not help expressinghis surprise.
"How is this?" said he, "you are rich and not gay - you,who were so anxious for wealth!"
"My friend, the pleasures to which we are not accustomedoppress us more than the griefs with which we are familiar.Give me your opinion, if you please. I can ask you, who havealways had money: when we have money, what do we do withit?"
"That depends."
"What have you done with yours, seeing that it has not madeyou a miser or a prodigal? For avarice dries up the heart,and prodigality drowns it - is not that so?"
"Fabricius could not have spoken more justly. But in truth,my money has never been a burden to me."
"How so? Do you place it out at interest?"
"No; you know I have a tolerably handsome house; and thathouse composes the better part of my property."
"I know it does."
"So that you can be as rich as I am, and, indeed more rich,whenever you like, by the same means."
"But your rents, - do you lay them by?"
"What do you think of a chest concealed in a wall?"
"I never made use of such a thing."
"Then you must have some confidant, some safe man ofbusiness who pays you interest at a fair rate."
"Not at all."
"Good heavens! what do you do with it, then?"
"I spend all I have, and I only have what I spend, my dearD'Artagnan."
"Ah that may be. But you are something of a prince, fifteenor sixteen thousand livres melt away between your fingers;and then you have expenses and appearances - - "
"Well, I don't see why you should be less of a noble than Iam, my friend; your money would be quite sufficient."
"Three hundred thousand crowns! Two-thirds too much!"
"I beg your pardon - did you not tell me? - I thought Iheard you say - I fancied you had a partner - - "
"Ah! Mordioux! that's true," cried D'Artagnan, coloring;"there is Planchet. I had forgotten Planchet, upon my life!Well! there are my three hundred thousand crowns brokeninto. That's a pity! it was a round sum, and sounded well.That is true, Athos; I am no longer rich. What a memory youhave!"
"Tolerably good; yes, thank God!"
"The worthy Planchet!" grumbled D'Artagnan; "his was not abad dream! What a speculation! Peste! Well! what is said issaid."
"How much are you to give him?"
"Oh!" said D'Artagnan, "he is not a bad fellow; I shallarrange matters with him. I have had a great deal oftrouble, you see, and expenses; all that must be taken intoaccount."
"My dear friend, I can depend upon you, and have no fear forthe worthy Planchet; his interests are better in your handsthan in his own. But now that you have nothing more to dohere, we shall depart, if you please. You can go and thankhis majesty, ask if he has any commands, and in six days wemay be able to get sight of the towers of Notre Dame."
"My friend, I am most anxious to be off, and will go at onceand pay my respects to the king."
"I," said Athos, "am going to call upon some friends in thecity, and shall then be at your service."
"Will you lend me Grimaud?"
"With all my heart. What do you want to do with him?"
"Something very simple, and which will not fatigue him; Ishall only beg him to take charge of my pistols, which liethere on the table near that coffer."
"Very well!" replied Athos, imperturbably.
"And he will not stir, will he?"
"Not more than the pistols themselves."
"Then I shall go and take leave of his majesty. Au revoir!"
D'Artagnan arrived at St. James's, where Charles II. who wasbusy writing, kept him in the ante-chamber a full hour.Whilst walking about in the gallery, from the door to thewindow, from the window to the door, he thought he saw acloak like Athos's cross the vestibule; but at the moment hewas going to ascertain if it were he, the usher summoned himto his majesty's presence. Charles II. rubbed his handswhile receiving the thanks of our friend.
"Chevalier," said he, "you are wrong to express gratitude tome; I have not paid you a quarter of the value of thehistory of the box into which you put the brave general - the excellent Duke of Albemarle, I mean." And the kinglaughed heartily.
D'Artagnan did not think it proper to interrupt his majesty,and bowed with much modesty.
"A propos," continued Charles, "do you think my dear Monkhas really pardoned you?"
"Pardoned me! yes, I hope so, sire!"
"Eh! - but it was a cruel trick! Odds fish! to pack up thefirst personage of the English revolution like a herring. Inyour place I would not trust him, chevalier."
"But, sire - - "
"Yes, I know very well that Monk calls you his friend, buthe has too penetrating an eye not to have a memory, and toolofty a brow not to be very proud, you know grandesupercilium."
"I shall certainly learn Latin," said D'Artagnan to himself.
"But stop," cried the merry monarch, "I must manage yourreconciliation; I know how to set about it; so - - "
D'Artagnan bit his mustache. "Will your majesty permit me totell you the truth?"
"Speak, chevalier, speak."
"Well, sire, you alarm me greatly. If your majestyundertakes the affair, as you seem inclined to do, I am alost man; the duke will have me assassinated."
The king burst into a fresh roar of laughter, which changedD'Artagnan's alarm into downright terror.
"Sire, I beg you to allow me to settle this matter myself,and if your majesty has no further need of my services - - "
"No, chevalier. What, do you want to leave us?" repliedCharles, with a hilarity that grew more and more alarming.
"If your majesty has no more commands for me."
Charles became more serious.
"One single thing. See my sister, the Lady Henrietta. Do youknow her?"
"No, sire, but - an old soldier like me is not an agreeablespectacle for a young and gay princess."
"Ah! but my sister must know you; she must in case of needhave you to depend upon."
"Sire, every one that is dear to your majesty will be sacredto me."
"Very well! - Parry! Come here, Parry!"
The side door opened and Parry entered, his face beamingwith pleasure as soon as he saw D'Artagnan.
"What is Rochester doing?" said the king.
"He is on the canal with the ladies," replied Parry.
"And Buckingham?"
"He is there also."
"That is well. You will conduct the chevalier to Villiers;that is the Duke of Buckingham, chevalier; and beg the duketo introduce M. d'Artagnan to the Princess Henrietta."
Parry bowed and smiled to D'Artagnan.
"Chevalier," continued the king, "this is your partingaudience; you can afterwards set out as soon as you please."
"Sire, I thank you."
"But be sure you make your peace with Monk!"
"Oh, sire - - "
"You know there is one of my vessels at your disposal?"
"Sire, you overpower me; I cannot think of putting yourmajesty's officers to inconvenience on my account."
The king slapped D'Artagnan upon the shoulder.
"Nobody will be inconvenienced on your account, chevalier,but for that of an ambassador I am about sending to France,and to whom you will willingly serve as a companion, Ifancy, for you know him."
D'Artagnan appeared astonished.
"He is a certain Comte de la Fere, - whom you call Athos,"added the king, terminating the conversation, as he hadbegun it, by a joyous burst of laughter. "Adieu, chevalier,adieu. Love me as I love you." And thereupon making a signto Parry to ask if there were any one waiting for him in theadjoining closet, the king disappeared into that closet,leaving the chevalier perfectly astonished by this singularaudience. The old man took his arm in a friendly way, andled him towards the garden.